Build a Gingerbread House with a Preschooler or Toddler

Kate is 2. And that’s an important detail to consider when you set out to build a gingerbread house with a preschooler or a toddler. How hard could it be to adapt a project to be age-appropriate when you are starting with something so basic and so basically fun?

A lot, it turns out. I think I expected Kate to be immediately excited about the opportunity to build a gingerbread house with Grandma, and she was—because that colorful box was full of interesting packages of colorful candies. What I had not anticipated was that with a 4-minute attention span and an aversion to getting frosting on her fingers, Kate and I had pretty different goals in mind as far as gingerbread house creation was concerned. I wanted her to have fun and create. She, on the other hand, was mostly interested in eating gumdrops.

But despite my naïve expectations, we still had a lot of fun playing with gingerbread. I just had to be willing to adapt my plan. I hadn’t expected it to be a 5-minutes-at-a-time, all-day project, but that’s O.K. She was willing to return to the kitchen now and then throughout the day, and both of us enjoyed the diversion provided by this fun holiday activity.

Kate couldn’t squeeze frosting out of the bag by herself, but she was perfectly content to help me hold the bag. I tried to give her as much control as I could. “Should we make the window or the door next?” “What if I put some frosting here and you stick a candy in it?” If I put a red candy and then a green candy and then a red candy, what comes next?”

After several 5-minute sessions, broken up by moments of coloring on the whiteboard, playing “store” in the basement, painting with watercolors, and a nap complete with 4 read-aloud books (I’m not sure which one of us fell asleep first), we mostly decorated 2 ½ of our 4 gingerbread houses. We also ate a few gumdrops. But by far the most important event of the day was the moment when I was piping some red frosting out of the frosting bag to outline one of the doors on her gingerbread house. Totally out of the blue, Kate suddenly reached over and wrapped her little arms around me, and said, “I love you Gramma Nae.” The feeling I had at that moment is a little difficult to describe, but I felt it, physically, just like I felt the closeness of her hug. There was a stirring inside of my soul that realized, “maybe this little person actually cares about me almost as much as I care about her.” I realized that that connection, the relationship-building that happened was the real purpose for our gingerbread houses. I just hadn’t expected Kate to have figured that part out too.

Some tips for building a gingerbread house with a preschooler:

1. We used a purchased gingerbread house kit but you may choose to substitute graham crackers, or even make your own gingerbread ahead of time.
2. Glue all of the gingerbread house pieces together with a hot glue gun long before you sit down to decorate. Nix on trying to stick stuff together with the pre-packaged royal frosting. Not even adults have that much patience! You will cover most of the glue as you decorate, this project is not intended to be edible anyway. It’s simply an exercise in togetherness and creativity.
3. Get all decorating supplies set out and ready to go ahead of time. Fill the frosting bags, place candy in small dishes so little fingers can get ahold of them and they don’t end up rolling all over the floor. Have a damp cloth nearby, plus tools like a table knife for spreading frosting.
4. Let go of all quality control expectations. Depending on your child, you may get to make a lot of suggestions, or you may have to be totally hands-off and just creativity run wild. This is not at all about the finished product. It’s about one-on-one time and being totally present with your child for a few minutes, doing something that you both enjoy. When it stops being fun for either of you, it’s OK to stop decorating.